Breakups can be a very painful experience especially when you are not the initiator of the action. You begin to analyze and think about where you got it wrong. You imagine how your life will be without your partner and it makes you feel depressed and rejected. Well, let’s say she never really deserved you and you are just too good for her.
No matter how painful it is, I can assure you that following these steps will help wring you out of this bitterness and build a whole, new, happy You.
Give yourself time to heal. The pains of a rough break up can be very deep so you really need time to heal. That you are experiencing this pain does not make you weak, rather, it shows that you are strong enough to love someone else like yourself. Love requires a lot of courage, let that same courage help you to be strong and get over your pains.
Control the urge to call or visit her. Do your best to resist calling, texting, or even going to visit your ex-girlfriend. If its really over, you need to avoid getting those mixed emotions that will confuse you and finally hurt you the more.
Avoid contact locations. Avoid visiting places that you know she will always be. You need to get your mind off her for a while so you have to avoid bumping into her always. It will only get things mixed up.
Set Boundaries. Some ladies will want to leave you but will still want to get a piece of you. It is really important that you set boundaries after a break-up. You need to be vigilant and read the telltale signs. If she is the one trying to mend the bridge, let her know your stand and if she loves you, she should be able to respect your decision and if she doesn’t try a more gentle approach as she may be hurting as much as you are.
Talk to a Confidant, Friend, or Psychologist. It is often said that a problem shared is half solved. You don’t have to bear the weight of the pain all alone. Talking to someone can help lighten your burden. Be sure that your confidant is someone you can trust with your secrets and that they have a positive influence on your life.
Embrace your hobbies and interests. Engage in satisfying and fulfilling hobbies and interests. Whatever your passions may be, be it writing, dancing, singing, etc be bold to do it. Instead of dwelling on your past, embrace your future, and do things that will make you happy.
Socialize. Avoid being lonely and sulking. Go out and have fun. Hang out with your friends and colleagues. Even if you share the same friends with your ex, let them know that you are no longer together and that they should avoid raising issues concerning her.
Try Dating. Try dating to build other relationships. Start little and get to know your dates. Do not be quick to jump into another relationship in a bid to replace your ex. Take it one step at a time until you are sure.